Having relationships that work.
Well folks it is that time of year again when newspapers and magazines are full of brilliant suggestions and ideas for our New Year resolutions! Weight loss, fitness, new image, new prosperity – if only Santa had delivered all these nine days ago we wouldn’t need to have bothered! But then maybe what we wanted for Christmas has little to do with what we would like for 2011?
Now before you think this blog is about more ‘New Year resolutions - it isn’t. Judging by the HUGE response from the recent survey we invited you to complete, many of you already know what you are aiming for in 2011, regardless of Santa’s sack and New Year Resolutions!
For those who are clear and have completed the survey, many thanks and I hope you are enjoying the free audio download on Goal Setting and Time Management. If you haven’t managed to complete the survey due to a busy and snowy December, don’t worry as there will be another chance soon and I hope you will take it. Don’t just do it for us at P. S. Life Can Be Easy, do it for YOU. Let me explain a bit more.
One of the most powerful and positive things we can do for ourselves is to;
a) Become aware of what we want.
b) Write it down to open up the opportunity for change.
c) Imprint that intention in the mind to remind us of what we are intending.
So completing the survey alone will help you to do exactly that. This hugely increases the chances of success and for those of you who are seasonal, get the New Year Resolutions to last! If they actually do?
As many of you know I am married and a father of two boys, 21 years and 18 years. Every New Year, for at least ten now, we sit down together and complete our own family survey. This can be done with close partners and friends also. It is the best belated Christmas present you can give each other, as well as yourself. It doesn’t come from a PD book or an audio – just a winning formula for relationships that work and precious insights that would otherwise go unnoticed.
I’ll share it with you now; each person sits down with his/her own pen and paper and answers the prepared questions individually and honestly.
- Write down five best things (or more) that happened during the out going year.
- Write down five disappointments (or more) of the out going year.
- What do you hope to achieve in this New Year?
- If you could change one thing without upsetting the other person this New Year what would it be?
Then we share our answers with each other and compare notes. Each year without fail it reveals constructive insights that would otherwise go unnoticed and it allows each of us to have a voice. Particularly it reveals thoughts of the other person, which helps to level relationships and bring a closer understanding. The things that were left unsaid or revealed; helping the other person/people to understand better. It aids communication. This is NOT about judging or having a go at each other! It is a chance for level thinking with the other person so that it may invite the chance to find new common ground with them and avoid unnecessary irritancies. It can be something as simple as tidying up after yourself, in the house or remembering not to leave the car empty of fuel for the other person and so on. Try it for yourself, keep it light hearted and fun but with a purpose too. It is still, remember, the season of goodwill!
There will be another chance to complete the survey if you have not yet been in the right moment to do so. Acknowledging your current situation is the best New Year’s gift you can give yourself. Deciding how to move forward is then a much easier task.
Awareness is halfway to solution. It is also the difference between having New Year Resolutions that work and ones which don’t. Be a winner rather than risk being a loser. It’s much more fun!
Wishing you fun, laughter, success and happiness for 2011 and that it becomes your best year ever.
Billy
