What single issue gets us all down from time to time until we deal with it? But is actually one if the simplest problems to solve. We only need to be aware that it is….
Having to do things we don’t enjoy doing…….. And what we can do about it to make things better for ourselves.
I’d like to share a case study.
Some months back I worked with a client who was redressing the work/ life balance in his life, I will call him John.
John ran his own business, gave it his all but a slower economy was taking its toll on the financial return.
So he decided to take on a job to supplement his income temporarily. Fortunately it was the type of business it was possible to put on hold until things picked up again.
But going from the flexibility of self employment to working 9 - 5 or should I say 7- 6.30 including travelling time was taking its toll on John’s private life.
At first the job salary answered the business cash flow questions – but brought new challenges like:
- Long hours.
- Problematic client issues to be dealt with.
- A phone that never stopped ringing.
- Grumpy people constantly on the other end of it.
- A huge work load that seemed to take forever to clear as their predecessor in the post had not left things up to date.
- And a growing realization that no one ever stuck at this post within the company for any length of time.
So why did John choose this job?
- Well for a start it paid the bills….. Always a consideration!
- It was a regular monthly salary – something quite attractive in a slow economy.
- It would reduce his working hours – to free up more fun and leisure time – or so he thought!
- It would give him more time for health and fitness which had been flagging under self employment – Wrong!
- What it gave John was the hideous realization that he had jumped from the frying pan into the fire when he considered his work life balance.
So what was he to do? What could he do?
Now you may well be thinking that if John had done his homework properly, he would have chosen more wisely, carefully and known what he was getting himself into. And I would agree.
But he was understandably lured by the job vacancy, the long established reputable company, good prospects for promotion, salary increases and job references along the way. Even the fact they had umpteen branches to choose from in future. It was also on the same lines as his own business and they were willing to offer him the job. Nice when you need money!
So, on closer listening I felt a degree of sympathy for John and the predicament he had found himself in and offered to help.
He was now stuck in a job he disliked, felt trapped by it, which was getting him really down but felt he had little option. Major stress was setting in. His evenings and weekends were spent thinking about Monday morning and only added to his sense of helplessness. So there was no escape – or so it seemed.
Enter P.S. Life Can Be Easy. In little over 2 hours I helped John turn his situation around. You see, what was really going on for him was not the present situation but the lack of clarity and objective around it. He was also busy missing what he had had – or thought he had – and worrying about what he would have to put up with tomorrow. He was completely fogged up about the present – the current situation.
During his session he completely evaluated:
- Why he took this job in the first place
- How he could turn a seemingly lost cause into a positive outcome
- By approaching each morning with a different mindset, he could create positive results from his working day.
- Use the experience to get to where he wanted to be in 3 months time, ready for promotion, a job reference and having created a good impression with the company. And so on.
And guess what happened?
- Suddenly his day was much more enjoyable
- He rearranged his day so that he was not constantly run by problematic phone calls
- And when he did, because his energy towards the job changed, so did the temperament of the callers. They were easier to deal with.
- He went home at night from work, less stressed and could relax with some quality time with his friends.
What started out as a seemingly hopeless situation completely turned around to one that was at least bearable, constructive and actually quite educational. A means to an end.
And the moral to this story? When you think you don’t enjoy doing something or don’t want to do it or want to give up, give yourself a break! Even if it is not what is right for you long term, the short term can always be readdressed to turn the negative into positive. Failure into success, drudgery into pleasure. Whether it is your work, that workout session that turns you off or visiting the family you cannot be bothered with, it does not have to be that way.
By stopping, looking, listening and reviewing, I promise you there is always another way to get the job done.
The younger generation are encouraged to ‘only do it if you enjoy it’ yeah great! But sometimes immediate change for the sake of change, is not the practical solution. Personally, I do not think it is fair or constructive to allow youngsters to believe that if they do not WANT to do something because they believe they do not ENJOY it, it encourages them to feel defeated, not tackle the real issue, and they can feel dissatisfied.
But if we can change our approach to it, in the short term, it definitely is.
All helps in the happiness and contentment stakes!
